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It’s official, Directioners, Harry Styles has signed to Columbia Records as a solo artist.
The news was announced yesterday in an exclusive reported by Billboard. Although Harry has yet to release a personal statement, it’s safe to say that we all saw this coming.
As billions of One Direction fans around the world cry and angrily tear their band posters down from the walls, we’re here to show all of you the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. What could possibly be the silver lining to such devastating news, you may ask? The answer is simple: Beyonce.
Once upon a time, similar to our beloved One Direction, there was a musical and majestic ’90s girl group who went by the name of Destiny’s Child. Like One Direction, Destiny’s Child had their fair share of No. 1 hits and dedicated fans, fans who were heartbroken when they split. However, without the group’s tragic demise, the world would have never been graced with the solo reign of Queen Bey. And could you imagine a world without Lemonade?
Now, we’re not saying that Harry Styles will ever be booty popping and hair flipping like our girl Beyonce, but now that he’s gearing up to begin his solo career—he has the potential to be something great. Check out our guide for how Harry Styles can reach Beyonce status below.
Michelle and the red-headed chick held back Beyonce, and the father and the leprechaun are doing it to Harry (sorry, we ain’t sorry). It’s time to pull a Beyonce (or a Zayn?) and spread your wings and fly, Harry.
Beyonce’s first solo debut was on Jay Z’s “03 Bonnie and Clyde.” Maybe Harry can sing a few riffs on a Kendrick Lamar song?
Harry is already ahead of the game with his role in the upcoming film, Dunkirk. It’s no Foxxy Cleopatra in Austin Powers in Goldmember, but I guess we’ll take it.
Condition: Album must be fire.
Jay Z is taken, but we hear Desiigner is available. Their wedding could be panda themed.
You must be proficient in business, finance, directing, branding and producing.
It’s a part of the Beyonce package. Buy yourself a leotard and hit the dance studio, Harry. It’s time.
Breaks are for the weak. Always keep the world guessing with surprises, visual albums and songs that put your cheating spouse on blast.