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The 69th Annual Emmy Awards ceremony was full of more speeches, musical numbers, shout-outs, and shockers than we can count. It’d take us forever to cover it all, so instead we’re turning the tables by presenting our own awards to the funniest, sweetest, most heart-wrenching moments of the night.
Emmy host Stephen Colbert and fellow late-night veteran Jimmy Kimmel cracked us up when they pretended to be drunk and downtrodden after Last Week Tonight with John Oliver won the award for Outstanding Variety Talk Series. But it was ultimately RuPaul who stole the show when she spoke to Colbert as “Emmy,” the real, live, human-sized version of the coveted statue. Emmy spilled the tea about her short-lived romantic tryst with Oscar (“I just couldn’t trust a man who’s naked and holding a sword”) and advised future Emmy winners to refrain from commenting on her weight (“because that’s just plain rude”).
We’ve got to give this one up to the cast of HBO’s Big Little Lies. Last night was a big night for women in the entertainment industry—including Bravo’s The Handmaid’s Tale’s Reed Morano, the first women to win a directing Emmy for a drama series in 22 years. Nothing appealed to our female empowerment-loving hearts more, however, than Nicole Kidman and Reese Witherspoon urging creators to keep writing complex, interesting roles for women. We need those two to star in a movie together like, yesterday.
We can always rely on the Emmys to provide us with a big, showy, well-produced opening musical number. But out favourite musical moment actually came partway through the show, when Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’s Rachel Bloom took the stage in a top hat and sparkly blazer. What was Bloom presenting, you ask? Only the best part of every Emmys ceremony—the introduction of the Ernst & Young accountants.
In a ceremony chock-full of barbs against and critiques of Donald Trump, the most pointed call-out of the night appropriately came from Saturday Night Live Trump impersonator Alec Baldwin. Earlier in the ceremony, Colbert noted that Trump received several Emmy nominations for The Apprentice but never actually took home an award. Later, when Baldwin picked up his award for Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series, he made this snide remark:
Aziz Ansari and writing partner Lena Waithe won the Emmy for Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series for their moving Master of None episode, “Thanksgiving.” Waithe’s win makes her the first black woman to win a comedy writing award, and she made sure to acknowledge the significance of the win in her touching acceptance speech. Waithe gave a shout out not only to her girlfriend, but to the members LGBTQIA+ community as a whole, urging them to “put on your imaginary cape and go out there and conquer the world because the world would not be as beautiful as it is without us in it.”
And speaking of Emmy 2017 milestones, Riz Ahmed officially became the first Asian man to receive an acting Emmy after winning the Outstanding Lead Actor in a Limited Series award for his role in The Night Of. The Rogue One actor is clearly on his way to becoming a household name, and we’re here for it.
When someone as iconic as Oprah sits in the front row of an award show, it’s hard not to give her a shout-out. Colbert was the first one to give the TV legend a much-deserved acknowledgement, followed by John Oliver and Riz Ahmed. Oliver took the stage a second time to pick up another Last Week Tonight award and, disappointed that Oprah was no longer in her seat, decided to say hello to her seat filler instead. Why not, right?
You can check out all of these award-worthy moments (and tonnes more) by streaming the entire 2017 Emmy Awards on CTV.ca.