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It was literally all hands on deck for tonight’s new episode of Pretty Little Liars which saw the girls doing what they do best; effortlessly breaking in the places while keeping their eyebrows on fleek. Let’s get to it.
Spencer and Caleb are in full couple mode and you can tell the relationship is new by the saucy lingerie Spencer is still sporting. Two more months and it’ll be free extra large charity T-shirts and ratty pajama pants.
Someone scheduled a lunch date for Spencer and Yvonne and Spencer goes with it, pretending to ask about political life when really she’s just imagining what Yvonne and Toby babies would look like. Yvonne leaves her cell phone at the restaurant and makes it down the street before noticing, which means she totally left it on purpose.
Caleb breaks into the cell and finds a secret folder on the Hastings that he can’t access. Not sure why this is shocking. Isn’t politics all about digging up dirt on your opponent? Mona makes an all too brief appearance as the Phillips family cell phone retriever and nails Spencer on “finding” Yvonne’s phone outside the restaurant.
Byron is finally ready to unveil his giant secret to Aria, which has nothing to do with why he’s leaving voicemail’s for Ezra. The person he was at Radley to see was Ella and the two are now back together. That story would make a lot more sense if Ella didn’t have her own apartment. Aria calls her parents out for not even sending a “Are you horribly depressed?” text after Charlotte’s hearing and they explain that they wanted to give her space. That space is what got her kidnapped in the first place. You’re nothing if not consistent, Montgomery family. Apparently the formerly-married couple spent the night Charlotte was killed in Ella’s apartment. No word on whether they were golfing.
Aria is still concerned that her father had something to do with Charlotte’s death and enlists Spencer and her long legs to jump the balcony of Sara Harvey’s adjoining room at Radley and break-in to her suite. The girls find drawers and drawers of fake hands and gloves, as well as blueprints that show Sara Harvey has rented the same room Charlotte stayed in as a patient at Radley. In the closet they also find a giant hole in the wall and a never-ending ladder that goes to the basement. Or hell. This is Rosewood after all. It may just go straight to hell.
Alison is back in town from visiting cows or whatever it was she was doing. She sends her boyfriend to Lucas’s apartment where she somehow knows Hannah and Emily are staying even though neither of them are answering her text messages.
Emily has finally grown a backbone and is ignoring Alison, but when no one shows up to go with her for her egg retrieval process she agrees to let Alison and hold her hand. Bad news for Emily though. The couple who were buying her eggs got pregnant literally in the middle of the procedure and now Emily is out of eggs and money. Who would pass up a chance at that bone structure? Emily has to decide what to do with her eggs, but first she gets a message from, well, are we calling this person ‘A’? She gets a message that A is going to steal her eggs. We know that Alison’s boyfriend, Dr. Rollins, saw Emily’s paperwork about the egg retrieval, so the messages could be coming from him. Wait, wait, who else knows about Emily’s egg retrieval? She’s been giving herself injections in front of open doors, so it could literally be anyone.
Alison gets a visit from Sara Harvey who manages impeccable eyeliner without the use of her hands. I hope she has a YouTube channel. Sara lays on a sob story about how close she and Charlotte actually were and Alison takes the bait. You would think a compulsive liar would recognize another compulsive liar, like they could smell it on each other, but apparently not.
Hanna still has a job even though from our calculation as she hasn’t shown up in a month. When she finally does make an appearance, the poor man’s Devil wears Prada fires her for not being a human garbage dispenser of gum. Hanna’s suspiciously perfect fiancé offers to do everything short of having the woman killed, which I wouldn’t put past him.
Now Hannah will have more time to do things like be a pot calling the kettle black and accuse her mom of stealing the hard drive and keeping the Liars out of jail.
Hanna and Caleb put together a fake drive and drop that in a garbage can for ‘A’, which successfully crashes ‘A’s computer. Then Hanna gets all sad sack-ish when she sees Spencer and Caleb together. It’s the only normal reaction she has to anything this entire episode.