Tonight’s brand new episode of Pretty Little Liars gave us a dark flashback, a wedding shower, and the first Liar injury of the time-hop. Congrats Aria! Let’s get to it.
Aria looks through photos of Byron and Ella’s wedding and realizes that someone snagged her camera and left the message “Give me the killer by election night or you lose.” Lose the election or lose their lives? Does anyone other than Spencer really care if Mrs. Hastings is elected? This whole stalking thing could be a moot point.
The media has picked up the story of Caleb leaking Yvonne’s medical files and Mr. Hastings, who is only allowed in episodes where Mrs. Hastings is off screen, demands that Spencer break up with Caleb. Toby, who as far as we can tell is still no the Police Chief of Rosewood and shouldn’t be giving press conferences, gives a press conference to support Yvonne and condemn the leak. His next order of business is punching Caleb in the face, which is understandable given the circumstance.
Caleb still refuses to tell Toby the truth, even though his reasoning of protecting Toby makes zero sense. Spencer meets with Toby and reveals that Caleb wasn’t behind the leak. Their coffee date happens after she flashbacks to sophomore year, when the young couple had a pregnancy scare.
Spencer also runs into Mona at The Brew, who has been fired for giving Spencer a heads up about her mom’s medical records. This would be a nice time to offer Mona a job on the Hastings campaign. We know there’s been an opening recently!
Spencer has lots of time for flashbacks because Melissa isn’t around to be interrogated about crappy luggage. Instead, she’s taken off for Europe and left without saying goodbye to her sister, who lives in the same house, which is a totally normal thing to do. Mr. Hastings eventually tells Spencer that Melissa only came back to Rosewood before Charlotte’s trial because someone was blackmailing her, saying they had a video of Melissa confessing to killing Bethany Young. Melissa dropped off some money in an envelope and then decided that peace’ing out of Rosewood after Charlotte’s death seemed like a good idea.
Emily is hot on the trail of Whistle Tips, which according to Ezra, who we don’t think even owns a car, are things you put on your muffler to make a hissing sound. It’s the same sound the truck that chased down Emily made.
Following one bad decision with another, Emily finds Rosewood’s shadiest garage and pays a group of murderous looking mechanics a visit all by herself. She finds the truck that chased her with what she thinks is paint from the trailer she hid on top of and demands to know if Melissa was the driver. The least terrifying woman out of a group of terrifying mechanics says it wasn’t Melissa, then wipes off the paint and counts an envelope of hundred dollar bills after Emily leaves.
Hanna has set an arbitrary wedding date, which means it’s time to have a wedding shower. For some reason Ashley, who owns a beautiful home and manages a hotel, decides to throw the shower at Lucas’ apartment, because that makes total sense. Hanna isn’t too happy with her Mother of the Bride because she offered Caleb her guest room. We can all agree that Ashley would sleep with her daughter’s ex, right? Good, glad we’ve talked about it.
Ashley wants to throw a traditional wedding shower in the apartment of the boy who was obsessed with her daughter in high school, but that means traditional games and none of Hanna’s friends could identify Jordan if he was standing in front of them with a name tag that said ‘I’m Jordan, Hanna’s fiance’.
Mona shows up with a pretty crappy gift and invites herself in. Moments later there’s an explosion from Lucas’ fireplace and Aria is set on fire. RIP Aria.
Just kidding! She got a few second degree burns but she should be back to mixing patterns in no time. Ezra runs to her side with a bag full of magazines and proceeds to spend hours reading to her, although as far as we can tell she has three other girlfriends who can do this and oh yeah, her eyes weren’t injured. Liam shows up eventually and announces that Ezra’s plan to lure his girlfriend away and have her co-author his book has worked. Jillian loves the idea and we’re guessing Liam does not. As Aria said, Ezra only mentioned the co-authoring idea to Jillian as a mistake. Liam’s response that has now made him our favourite PLL character? “It wasn’t an accident. He didn’t fall off a bicycle. He made a decision.” Mic drop.
Before Aria was sacrificed so Hanna’s shower presents could live, someone (aka probably Alison because she’s totally behind all this) called Lieutenant Tanner and described Aria, saying she made a phone call from the Two Crows diner the night Charlotte died. Aria is brought in a for a line up and manages to sneak a peek at a file that says the person who called was an attractive brunette with a pink dice key chain.
While cleaning up after the wedding shower, Emily notices that Mona has that very key chain and tells her it’s time they talk. I’d pick Mona winning that fight any day.